Like I said it is only because of God's grace that I am here today instead of some other place that would not be beneficial for my soul. Just look at the graces that He has given me throughout this year alone like a chance to talk about Him on retreats, 1 on 1 prayer (which by the way is still pretty weird for me), friendships with my teammates, caring staff, the joy of living in WI, and so many other things. I have grown so much in many areas, but for me one of the biggest graces that God has given me is being able to speak in front of thousands of youth granted not all at the same time (Yikes!!!) but nevertheless speaking to the Youth. Before I came here, I was very intimated by the Youth thinking that I can never relate to them and all that they would see is some clumsy adult trying to be young or that they would think I am foolish. Over this last year, my heart has changed and I see these youth as little men and women who have their own unique personalities. All of them are striving to find that joy that will satisfy them. And it is this notion that I am part of a ministry to bring even a glimpse of that joy into their hearts that has filled me with a sense of peace. I am no longer intimated by the Youth. Yah, it is still scary to go up every single time and give my presentation and witness or do some acting in front of them. I just take a deep breath now and give it all to God and surprisingly enough I actually get along well with the kids. Who would have thought? This ministry is not about me or any of the others, it is about glorifying God and making His name known throughout. Pray for the ministry that it can continue to grow and pray for each one of us that we can grow deeper in our relationship with God so we can be the fire to ignite the world.
SPIRITUS Team 8
Wednesday, May 1, 2013
Ha, God did it again. :)
Discerning God's Will for your life is a tricky business. Every-time you think you have it figured out God pulls a fast one on you and flips everything Topsy-turvy. There I was on my way studying to be an actor a few years back when all of a sudden through a period of a Crisis of Faith I was pushed by God into a study of Theology and with a lot of twists and turns ended up on the SPIRITUS team. It has been a wild ride especially this last year with this team. All I can say is that it is only because of the grace of God that I am here today. Granted I have my ups and downs and I am not perfect by any scale of the imagination, but I know that God if fighting for me. Being here is not by happenstance, but because God knew that I needed to be here so I can grow in my relationship with Him. I still have no idea what God wants to do in my life. Instead of a pull to something that most people get I feel like I am being pushed somewhere. Where? Good question, I have no idea. Until then I strive to be accepting of where I am at today and not to worry about tomorrow.
Moments of Grace
I believe that the greatest moments of grace are often left unseen.
This is by God's design because He wishes to bless us through our faith
in Him. SPIRITUS has brought many moments of grace that I will never see
the fruits of, but every once in a while, God reveals something to me
that is nothing less than a beautiful gift.
One of these gifted moments came to me in the fall. Our team was overbooked on a Monday and we ended up putting in 17 hours of retreats, traveling, and Bible study. Despite the long hours, God graced me with an unsuspecting energy to lead the Bible study discussions. I had wonderful interactions with the teens, but after it was over, I really didn't know how everything went. Two weeks later, we were at Teen Disciples again, and a student came up to me and told me that the previous meeting was the best experience she has had with SPIRITUS (and she loves SPIRITUS!). At that moment, I knew that I could never truly begin to know the full impact we are having because such knowledge may rest only with God.
One of these gifted moments came to me in the fall. Our team was overbooked on a Monday and we ended up putting in 17 hours of retreats, traveling, and Bible study. Despite the long hours, God graced me with an unsuspecting energy to lead the Bible study discussions. I had wonderful interactions with the teens, but after it was over, I really didn't know how everything went. Two weeks later, we were at Teen Disciples again, and a student came up to me and told me that the previous meeting was the best experience she has had with SPIRITUS (and she loves SPIRITUS!). At that moment, I knew that I could never truly begin to know the full impact we are having because such knowledge may rest only with God.
Dear St. Anthony...
On SPIRITUS, we encounter MANY moments of grace, which is so awesome and so apparent by my other teammates' posts, but this past week, I experienced a moment of grace through the intercession of a particular saint:
I did take it out once or twice to make sure I didn't have any missed phone calls. But, I wanted to practice detachment and just enjoy being in the presence of my teammates. After we checked out of our room, we loaded everything back into Jimmy (our big, white van) and spent a couple more hours at the waterpark.
I brought a bag with me that had some essentials items including my purse that had my phone in it. I spent the afternoon relaxing by the wave pool. I had my ipod and I thought I checked my phone during this time.
Well, we were about 45 minutes in Jimmy driving back to our headquarters and I go to check my phone. So I open my purse and my big, red brick of a phone is not in there. So I started digging through all my stuff. Michael was sitting next to me and suggested I pray to St. Anthony (who has helped me with lost items before in the past!) so naturally, I did.
I continue to look and I could not find my phone. I was determined I left it in the hotel room or back at the waterpark so I called the facility and spoke to the person in charge of lost and found. They said nothing was turned in and took down my information. At this point, I was frustrated, but if I lost the phone maybe I should accept it and practice detachment. After all, our parents didn't grow up with cell phones, how hard could it be?
So I offerred it up to the Lord. I told him that if I couldn't find my cell phone and if it was completely lost, I wouldn't go looking for a new one (also, I can't afford a new phone). This was after praying to St. Anthony.
We keep driving and whatnot and I decided to pick up the stuff around my area and lo and behold! The big, red brick is literally sitting right next to my leg!! I screamed a little bit and then proceeded to tell everyone how much of an idiot I was seeing as how my phone was sitting next to me this whole time!! Michael then chimed in and said, "No! It was St. Anthony!!!"
So I am not cell phone-less. St. Anthony is amazing and detachment is NEVER a bad thing, especially when it comes to technology. Oh, and I've appreciated the moment of grace God granted to me in that moment!
Saint Anthony!
We had our team vacation down at the Wisconsin Dells early this week and as we were leaving, of course we all made sure everyone had everything. Now, this whole time, I tried not using my cell phone. I put it in my purse and there it stayed for 48 hours, roughly.
I did take it out once or twice to make sure I didn't have any missed phone calls. But, I wanted to practice detachment and just enjoy being in the presence of my teammates. After we checked out of our room, we loaded everything back into Jimmy (our big, white van) and spent a couple more hours at the waterpark.
I brought a bag with me that had some essentials items including my purse that had my phone in it. I spent the afternoon relaxing by the wave pool. I had my ipod and I thought I checked my phone during this time.
Well, we were about 45 minutes in Jimmy driving back to our headquarters and I go to check my phone. So I open my purse and my big, red brick of a phone is not in there. So I started digging through all my stuff. Michael was sitting next to me and suggested I pray to St. Anthony (who has helped me with lost items before in the past!) so naturally, I did.
I continue to look and I could not find my phone. I was determined I left it in the hotel room or back at the waterpark so I called the facility and spoke to the person in charge of lost and found. They said nothing was turned in and took down my information. At this point, I was frustrated, but if I lost the phone maybe I should accept it and practice detachment. After all, our parents didn't grow up with cell phones, how hard could it be?
So I offerred it up to the Lord. I told him that if I couldn't find my cell phone and if it was completely lost, I wouldn't go looking for a new one (also, I can't afford a new phone). This was after praying to St. Anthony.
We keep driving and whatnot and I decided to pick up the stuff around my area and lo and behold! The big, red brick is literally sitting right next to my leg!! I screamed a little bit and then proceeded to tell everyone how much of an idiot I was seeing as how my phone was sitting next to me this whole time!! Michael then chimed in and said, "No! It was St. Anthony!!!"
So I am not cell phone-less. St. Anthony is amazing and detachment is NEVER a bad thing, especially when it comes to technology. Oh, and I've appreciated the moment of grace God granted to me in that moment!
Grace from Prayer
God’s grace has been abundant throughout my life, and
especially noticeable while I have been a part of SPIRITUS. One place on retreat where His grace is
especially present is during prayer, and particularly when I have the
opportunity to pray one on one with students.
This is a time where I get to have a conversation with an individual
student and then to just pray with them.
Often times we will pray with the students from our small groups and I
feel so blessed and awed at the openness some people have, even when they start
the conversation with I don’t really trust people, or I don’t like talking
about myself to people. I know that God
is working within them when they start to tell me things that they have never told
anyone before. Prayer is a time for them
to open up and not to just tell me, but to tell God, and to just ask for
help.
Recently I had a specific one on one prayer that was very
much filled with grace. I was praying
with an eighth grader who was so stressed out.
She came up to pray with me and when I asked what she wanted to pray
about she told me about all the pressures she faces to succeed in everything
she does, and how she is already worried about college. She walked away with relief because she was
finally able to talk about everything.
It was so wonderful to see that desire within her to continue to do all
she was doing but also to have a closer relationship with God. It’s moments
like this when I remember that I am so lucky to be here, because God is able to
work through all the students I meet to show me himself and His love.
Wednesday, April 17, 2013
A Moment of Grace
Those moments where you are on retreat in front of a
bunch of students sharing your personal witness are always moments full of God’s
grace. I know that if God isn’t strengthening me and supplying me with many
graces, I won’t be able to open my heart to these kids and share the joys and
the suffering of my past and what I am going through today. I desperately need
God’s grace in order to be vulnerable and open which is the foundation of this
ministry. The moments where my witness has personally affected a student are,
by far, some of the greatest gifts that I’ve received by God. One of these
instances has been ingrained in my head for many months. In one of our first retreats
of the year, we did a retreat where I shared a really personal witness that I
had not shared many times before. Later when we were praying one on one with
the students I felt drawn to pray with a certain girl from my small group. I
start talking to her and she told me that she went through the same thing I
went through. I was able to pray with her which led her to start crying and I
had to wipe away a few tears as well. It was at that moment that I was reminded
that the Holy Spirit works in such amazing ways! I also realized just how
important this ministry is. The fact that one student was impacted by my
witness makes all the suffering I went through completely worth it.
Moment of Grace
SPIRITUS in itself has been a grace. From the community life, to the healing that comes from sharing past experiences, to the formation we receive, and from the people we get to serve through this organization.
SPIRITUS has really been the perfect organization to serve others, and has shown me that in giving we receive. Through this journey of being on the team for two years now, the greatest grace has been being involved in working towards the mission of bringing Christ to young people. I can’t think of a greater grace than bringing the love and mercy which Christ offers all of us, to other people.
Aaron Lang, Servant Leader
Tuesday, April 16, 2013
They Will Surprise You
One of the most rewarding things SPIRITUS has done this year has been to work more closely with St. Patrick's Catholic Community in Menasha for youth ministry. While just being more closely associated with a parish has been awesome in and of itself, the best part of youth ministry for us is that we get to know certain students much better than we ever would have before. And in the course of getting to know these students and walking with them as they grow in faith, they've surprised me many times.
With the middle school students, we planted bean seeds in Styrofoam cups and had them write reminders to themselves to pray on the outside of the cup. One of the eighth-graders didn't think that was enough; she had everyone write their own name on her cup so that she could pray for all of us. (We liked her idea so much that we used it with our high school leadership team later on.)
Speaking of the high school students, I remember talking to one of them about what she was going to do for Lent. She didn't have any ideas. I mentioned something about adding extra daily prayers instead of giving something up, but didn't really make any suggestions. A few days later, when I saw her again and found out that she had decided to pray the Rosary every day. I checked in with her throughout Lent, and she was still going strong every time I asked.
Even more impressive to me are the efforts some of our regular Teen Disciples Bible study attendees are going to in order to remain firm in the faith and radically committed to God. We had a Bible study on the urgency of the mission a last week, and as part of the evening's activities, we had them write their own personal mission statement. Several students decided to have their peers (and the SPIRITUS team) sign their mission statements to hold them accountable to their missions and the commitments they made. A group of our Teen Disciples and their friends are already in the process of taking this simple exercise to a much deeper level; in fact, they had already been working on it for quite some time, and even have a website set up so others can join them! Check out the amazing commitment they're making here.
In little ways, in big ways, and every possible way in between, the students we have gotten to know over these past eight months have surprised and encouraged us. Talk to the young people you know about their faith and how it shapes their lives. They will surprise you!
With the middle school students, we planted bean seeds in Styrofoam cups and had them write reminders to themselves to pray on the outside of the cup. One of the eighth-graders didn't think that was enough; she had everyone write their own name on her cup so that she could pray for all of us. (We liked her idea so much that we used it with our high school leadership team later on.)
Speaking of the high school students, I remember talking to one of them about what she was going to do for Lent. She didn't have any ideas. I mentioned something about adding extra daily prayers instead of giving something up, but didn't really make any suggestions. A few days later, when I saw her again and found out that she had decided to pray the Rosary every day. I checked in with her throughout Lent, and she was still going strong every time I asked.
Even more impressive to me are the efforts some of our regular Teen Disciples Bible study attendees are going to in order to remain firm in the faith and radically committed to God. We had a Bible study on the urgency of the mission a last week, and as part of the evening's activities, we had them write their own personal mission statement. Several students decided to have their peers (and the SPIRITUS team) sign their mission statements to hold them accountable to their missions and the commitments they made. A group of our Teen Disciples and their friends are already in the process of taking this simple exercise to a much deeper level; in fact, they had already been working on it for quite some time, and even have a website set up so others can join them! Check out the amazing commitment they're making here.
In little ways, in big ways, and every possible way in between, the students we have gotten to know over these past eight months have surprised and encouraged us. Talk to the young people you know about their faith and how it shapes their lives. They will surprise you!
Wednesday, April 10, 2013
Feed My Sheep
For the Gospel passage this Sunday, we will hear Jesus asking Peter three times, "Simon, son of John, do you love me more than these?" Initially, we can recognize that this is Jesus reaffirming Peter's love for Him after Peter denied Him three times; but, additionally, we can see Peter's change of heart not only in his response, but also in his desire to jump into the water after Him which precedes his response. This is a big deal because early in the Gospel, it was Peter that got out of the boat, but sank into the water because he was afraid; it was also because of his fear that he denied Jesus. By swimming to shore, he disregarded any fear and proclaimed his faith and love for Christ, and Jesus responds, "Feed My Sheep", and "Follow Me.".
Throughout our lives, Christ will ask us if we love Him more than 'these'; 'these' being the things that keep us from living a full life, and 'these' meaning the fear that can cripple us from following Christ to the point of 'death'. As I reflect on the last 3 years of my time here with SPIRITUS, I am awed at how Christ keeps asking me if I love Him more than 'these' and if I will feed His sheep, and follow after Him. When I came to SPIRITUS, I definitely had a lot of things that were holding me back from jumping out of the boat, and professing my love for Christ. Each year, as those things diminish in stature, so increases my joy, my gifts that God wants me to share with people, and my purpose and Vocation in life. And as each year progressed, Christ has been in more control- like Peter, I feel Christ, "dressed me" and "tells me where to go" which will glorify Him the most-and it is more clear where He wants me to go. Being on the team, and being a leader for the team has given me an openness to where Christ wants me to go, and now, I am more apt to respond, "Yes Lord, you know that I love you."
Speaking of Feeding the Sheep, I want to invite any men to consider becoming 'fishers of men' for SPIRITUS. We are currently accepting applications for the next year SPIRITUS Teams (and yes, there are 2 teams now!). So if you are thinking about how to best serve the Lord, pray about joining the SPIRITUS Team, check out our website www.spiritusonline.org, or email me, Mark Rose, spiritusmdr@gmail.com if you have any questions.
Peace be with you all,
Mark Rose
SPIRITUS Coordinator
Throughout our lives, Christ will ask us if we love Him more than 'these'; 'these' being the things that keep us from living a full life, and 'these' meaning the fear that can cripple us from following Christ to the point of 'death'. As I reflect on the last 3 years of my time here with SPIRITUS, I am awed at how Christ keeps asking me if I love Him more than 'these' and if I will feed His sheep, and follow after Him. When I came to SPIRITUS, I definitely had a lot of things that were holding me back from jumping out of the boat, and professing my love for Christ. Each year, as those things diminish in stature, so increases my joy, my gifts that God wants me to share with people, and my purpose and Vocation in life. And as each year progressed, Christ has been in more control- like Peter, I feel Christ, "dressed me" and "tells me where to go" which will glorify Him the most-and it is more clear where He wants me to go. Being on the team, and being a leader for the team has given me an openness to where Christ wants me to go, and now, I am more apt to respond, "Yes Lord, you know that I love you."
Speaking of Feeding the Sheep, I want to invite any men to consider becoming 'fishers of men' for SPIRITUS. We are currently accepting applications for the next year SPIRITUS Teams (and yes, there are 2 teams now!). So if you are thinking about how to best serve the Lord, pray about joining the SPIRITUS Team, check out our website www.spiritusonline.org, or email me, Mark Rose, spiritusmdr@gmail.com if you have any questions.
Peace be with you all,
Mark Rose
SPIRITUS Coordinator
Thursday, March 28, 2013
To Know Jesus
"To know Jesus, to hear Jesus, to love Jesus, to trust Jesus, to obey Jesus, to share his life in the deepest fiber of our being, and then to serve him in his people -- this is our goal." This quote was made by Cardinal Dolan in his book that is addressed to priests, but it is very relevant to every Catholic. So many times in my life I have professed to know Jesus, to love Jesus, to trust Jesus and so on yet I am farther away on the path to heaven then when I first started. I have studied about Jesus, but never really got to know Him. I have talked about Jesus, but never really talked to Him. Basically I have been going through the motions for most of my life.
Thankfully, I came on SPIRITUS which has radically changed my lifestyle both physically and spiritually. I am now on a daily regimen of morning and evening prayer, daily Mass and spiritual formation weekly. Yes it was hard for the last 7 months facing the demons that have haunt me for trying to change my life since I have been in SPIRITUS, but with persistence and trust in the Lord I know that He is transforming me here. I made a General Confession the other day where I divulged to the priest my whole life story and it was amazing though pretty nerve-whacking. I feel a lot better and already on a better path. I just say take it one day at a time. Praise the Lord and let us follow the Cardinal's advice and strive to put Jesus at the center of our life.
Wednesday, March 27, 2013
Power of the Holy Spirit
So yesterday was my 2nd year anniversary of receiving the sacrament of Confirmation! How awesome, right?!
It's pretty wild to think that I've only really been an adult in the Catholic Church for the past 2 years even though I'm 23 years old and had a conversion of heart back when I was 18. It took me FOREVER to finally receive Confirmation. But God has quickly transformed my life because I chose to be anointed by the Holy Spirit.
First of all, I would not be apart of SPIRITUS if it were not for the Holy Spirit. By the power of the Holy Spirit, I have been able to stand up to nearly 5,000 youth over these past few months and witness to each and every one of them about my faith. I have been able to pray one-on-one with them, praise the Lord, laugh, cry, and just go crazy. All of this was not normal behavior for me before I came back to the faith.
I was an extremely selfish person growing up. I did not care or think about anyone but myself and what made me happy. This way of living left me feeling empty and alone. Not to mention, I had given my heart to a guy way before I even knew was love was. After he left me, I felt even more empty and alone. I had no idea what to do, where to go, who to trust. I found myself at a crossroads--either fall back into my selfish ways or live for something greater. I chose the second path, led by the Holy Spirit.
I am not a saint, at least not yet :P, but one day I hope to be. Being led by the Holy Spirit with our the Catholic faith is the best way to achieve that goal. The "rules" and "laws" of the Catholic Church are a roadmap that will lead us to Heaven, if we chose to follow them. And of course there is freedom within this that people don't understand! Because God is Love, and love is free.
So before we enter into this Easter Triduum, I challenge whoever is reading this right now to give your life to the Spirit and see where He leads you. Yes, it's a scary road, but think of it as a roller coaster--it has it's ups and downs, but at the end of the ride, you want to hop on for another go.
May the Peace of Christ enter your hearts during this Easter season.
+JMJ+
First of all, I would not be apart of SPIRITUS if it were not for the Holy Spirit. By the power of the Holy Spirit, I have been able to stand up to nearly 5,000 youth over these past few months and witness to each and every one of them about my faith. I have been able to pray one-on-one with them, praise the Lord, laugh, cry, and just go crazy. All of this was not normal behavior for me before I came back to the faith.
I was an extremely selfish person growing up. I did not care or think about anyone but myself and what made me happy. This way of living left me feeling empty and alone. Not to mention, I had given my heart to a guy way before I even knew was love was. After he left me, I felt even more empty and alone. I had no idea what to do, where to go, who to trust. I found myself at a crossroads--either fall back into my selfish ways or live for something greater. I chose the second path, led by the Holy Spirit.
I am not a saint, at least not yet :P, but one day I hope to be. Being led by the Holy Spirit with our the Catholic faith is the best way to achieve that goal. The "rules" and "laws" of the Catholic Church are a roadmap that will lead us to Heaven, if we chose to follow them. And of course there is freedom within this that people don't understand! Because God is Love, and love is free.
So before we enter into this Easter Triduum, I challenge whoever is reading this right now to give your life to the Spirit and see where He leads you. Yes, it's a scary road, but think of it as a roller coaster--it has it's ups and downs, but at the end of the ride, you want to hop on for another go.
May the Peace of Christ enter your hearts during this Easter season.
+JMJ+
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)